). Sunday wasn't all that bad either...Adam and I took Elijah with us to the old place to finish up the final cleaning and the walk through with the manager. Ahhhh yes, but then the new week started. Although we have moved someplace that is aproximately 3 minutes from Adam's work, I have added at least 25 minutes to my drive. So instead of the usual 6am feeding of the baby and then a quick snooze before heading off to work, I have to get up right away. And drop Elijah off at his grandparents house on my way into work. And then drive 20 minutes to work...which I am finding is a long drive when you're sleep deprived. All this would be okay if Adam and I were getting to bed early enough. But we're trying to unpack and organize and so on...which goes slowly when you have a 4 month old who has gotten very vocally demanding when he's hungry. And he has decided that he likes to take his time now when he eats...so during these 1 to 1 1/2 hour feeding marathons, I usually fall asleep feeding him because I'm just beat. This leaves Adam to unpack by himself...I usually wake up to find a pile of newspaper on the floor and at least a bunch of empty boxes. Then I feel guilty for not helping him...and then I remember that after our 6 month lease is up, we might just be doing this again! AUGH! 
awww...that face! 
The Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals that had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
MAY I GO?
Author: Susan A. Jackson
May I go now?
Do you think the time is right?
May I say goodbye to pain filled days
and endless lonely nights?
I've lived my life and done my best,
an example tried to be.
So can I take that step beyond
and set my spirit free?
I didn't want to go at first,
I fought with all my might.
But something seems to draw me now
to a warm and loving light.
I want to go...I really do.
It's difficult to stay.
But I will try as best I can
to live just one more day.
To give you time to care for me
and share your love and fears.
I know you're sad and afraid,
because I see your tears.
I'll not be far, I promise that,
and hope you'll always know
that my spirit will be close to you
wherever you may go.
Thank you so for loving me.
You know I love you, too.
That's why it's hard to say goodbye
and end this life with you.
So hold me now just one more time
and let me hear you say,
because you care so much for me,
you'll let me go today.
I STOOD BESIDE YOUR BED LAST NIGHT
Author unknown
I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, You found it so hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times, your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today, Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
I want to reassure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
It's possible for me, to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew ...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
and say "Goodnight, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out...then come home to be with me.
THE LAST BATTLE OR IF IT SHOULD BE
Author unknown
If it should be that I grow frail and weak,
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this -- the last battle -- can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
You wouldn't want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end,
And hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree,
It is a kindness you do for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you,
Who has to decide this thing to do.
Goodbye
Author: John Quealy
With heavy hearts and a tear in our eyes,
after all these years we must say goodbye.
Please understand I've done all I could,
if there was anything left to do, you know I would.
I'm sitting right here, gently rubbing your ears,
while I talk to you softly, trying to hold back the tears.
The memories you gave me, I'll never forget,
especially the ones of the day we first met.
One last hug and one last kiss,
you have no idea how much you'll be missed.
To look into your eyes this one last time,
you tell me it's ok...you know it's your time.
Close your eyes now and go to sleep,
I'll pray to the Lord...your soul he'll keep.
Go in peace now, my best little friend,
I'll stay right here with you until the end.
Dream of that special day and time,
when we'll meet at the Bridge, and all will be fine.
We'll run and play, side by side,
with a soft warm feeling, deep down inside.
Have a safe journey through the night,
I promise when you awake, you'll be in God's light.
So with a heavy heart, and tears in my eyes,
just for now, my friend...I must say goodbye.
) and when Elijah started crying in his swing, I thought "Well, I guess he wants some Mommy time" -- yeah, not quite. He had a massive poopy blowout in his diaper...all over his super-cute clothes. And as I was changing him, and he was smiling up at me from his changing table, I couldn't help but to be really angry at myself. I mean, how messed up is this? I have so many moms that work for me that DON'T want to stay home...they want to be out of the house. Good for them...but I want to be home and I can't...we can't manage that. And so many women are in the same place as me...they want to stay home and they just can't afford to. But there are these moms that work for me...I listen to them talk about how they can't wait for the opportunity to be away.
! And it just kills me to know that tomorrow morning is going to come and I have to be away from him from over 10 hours again...and it just sucks. One of the women I work with told me "Don't worry, Sandy...it'll get harder first but then it'll get easier". But you know what? I don't want that. I don't want to leave for work and not care. ARGH! This just sucks....So, I thought I should give this a try...it amused me thoroughly (it doesn't take much anymore)
1. YOUR REAL NAME:
Sandra Leigh Clark
2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle.)
Sanizzle
3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
Orange Penguin
4. YOUR SPY NAME: (middle name, and current street name)
Leigh Main
(that is by far the dumbest thing I have ever heard!)
5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name and first 2 letters of mom's maiden name, first 3 letters of your hometown)
Clasaherac
(why are my answers ending up so CRAZY?)
Claelgurac - that's Elijah's...it looks like the name for what he puked up earlier!
6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
Clear Ice Water
(HAHAHAHAHA! That is the best!)
7. YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle)
Aagevnu
(How would you pronounce that???)
8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (your dad's middle name, and your favorite authors last name)
Levi Cook
9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets)
Black Finnegan Bojangles BathroomLover Metrosexual Cowcat CrackBubbleBaby Finnley Memorial Hospital ForceFlex Alcove Jalapeno McKitty
(Don't ask...I have issues...deep-rooted, serious issues...)
I think Adam's goth name should be BLACK HUSSY!! I'm so amused....oh-so-amused!
That was thoroughly entertaining...especially the last one 
I just got off the phone with the manager who has been running my store since I went on maternity leave...can you believe that he wanted me to do a manager's schedule for next week? WHAT? I'm not back yet...if I do a schedule, that means I'm doing WORK this week. Forget that! I should have told him YES and then demanded to be paid for a 10-hour shift. HA...they would have taken as long to pay me for that as they took to get my disability pay to me. 
On another note, my poor baby obviously still isn't feeling too well today. He projectile-puked across the room earlier...it was WAY COOL! I had just set him down in his swing so I could run to the bathroom quick and as soon as I got back, he puked...I swear, it went like 4 feet in front of him! He looked so surprised...didn't seem too bothered by it, but he looked shocked
