Bad Back

I somehow put out my back...woke up yesterday and could hardly walk. I was SO hoping it would be better today...for my 9 miler. Nope...still having bad muscle spasms and lower back pain.

I'm frustrated. I haven't had any back issues since about 3 years ago. I thought this was over.

I'm frustrated because NOW I have missed 2 runs this week. I know I have to heal...and I know that I can't run like this (that would be quite the sight, I'm sure!). But I'm restless now.

And I'm frustrated because I have no idea what I did to aggravate an old problem. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr...

yuck

I had an awful run today. Yesterday I noticed I had a blister on my left heel...I got it while walking with my son in his stroller. I had my running shoes on...shouldn't have developed a blister but I did. Anyway, I did what I always do for blisters...popped it carefully, drained it and covered it with a band-aid and moleskin. I took extra moleskin on my run, just in case I needed it. I did...and it didn't help. My heel hurts so much now that I'm just irritated by it. I noticed a blister under my big toe on my right foot after my run today, too. My shoes are about 400 miles in...break in period is over and they are definitely not ready for retirement yet! At least I don't think they are. I've had some issues overall since getting these shoes...shin pain, calf pain, now blisters. Maybe they just aren't the correct shoe for me. I really need to go have myself analyzed at a good shoe store sometime.

Anyway, I was about 4 miles into my 5.5 mile run today when the drizzle that had been tolerable turned into a steady, heavier rain. I was pretty soaked when I got home. Soaked, achy feet, a cold shower (long story...ugh...)...

...and now I am SO tired! I can't wake up. I feel like I should just go to bed.

I don't know what's going on, but I have to say this was one of the worst runs I've had in months. I just feel very yucky now.

stupid weight plateau

I just can't seem to lose any more weight. It is extremely frustrating. Don't get me wrong...it's important to me that I'm healthy, and I love running and eating healthy. But my clothing supply is rather limited right now. Ever since one pair of jeans developed a rather large hole in the knee, I have ONE pair of jeans that fit. One... *sigh* And none of my pre-pregnancy shirts fit me anymore because my boobs just won't shrink anymore. So I have essentially t-shirts to wear...every day.

I just don't know what else to do. I know eventually my body will break this plateau but, well...summer is fast approaching and I really need to fit into more clothes.

This is all very frustrating...

aching shins

I have shin splints...for the first time in MONTHS! I should have known better...I decided to do some trail running the past two days. On Wednesday I did 6 miles and yesterday I did just over 5 miles. My legs are screaming at me right now. I overdid it...I just got so excited because the weather was so nice and I wanted to run outside as much as possible while my Adam was off from work. Ugh...I'm suffering today! I really, really want to go running today but I think I'm going to have to force myself to wait. With the walking/pushing the stroller I did today I think THAT with some stretching is about the extent of my training!

over a year...

It's been over a year of trying to get pregnant. It's been a year of semi-craziness on my part...waking up every morning and taking my temperature, charting signs and symptoms, and hoping, every month, that we would be pregnant. And every month that dream was shattered. Some months were harder than others...the months where I was really late and thought FOR SURE it HAD to be this month that it worked! Nope.

I told Adam that I was just going to stop thinking about it. I can't. I won't lie to myself. I want more children. I will still think about it...probably not as much but I'd be silly to say I'm just going to stand idly by and hope for the best.

It is in God's hands...this much I know. I can't plan it...but I was hoping I could maybe "help it along" a little. I guess not. My help wasn't needed in that area!

Who would have thought that it would be so difficult to get pregnant when you really want to have a baby? I mean, I know there are plenty of other people out there who have tried for longer, and I feel for them, too! It just doesn't seem right...

I really hope we're able to move into our new place soon. I think moving and having to unpack, clean, decorate, etc, will help me stay focused on other things. I hope it will.

Happy Valentine's Day

Good news - my thyroid is fine. Bad news - my thyroid is fine.

I am glad that my tests came back normal. But I still feel completely wiped out. And the other symptoms I'm experiencing still need to have an explanation. I pushed through all my workouts this week, and I have another one today. It should be a 5 mile long run but lately I've been beat after 3.5 miles. So we'll see...I'm going to do as much as I can. Once you hit a wall, though, that's it.

Elijah is sick this weekend, too, and Adam isn't home from being on the road. Kind of feels like a weekend that I'd rather spend in bed!

Today was a good work out, considering...

The past two months I have been struggling to actually WANT to run. I have been so exhausted. I just can't seem to sleep enough. I've also gained a little weight, despite running the same amount of miles (or slightly more) and eating the same amount of calories. I am always cold, my hair has been falling out, I'm very susceptible to illness and constantly have terrible overall body aches. All these symptoms have led me to the doctor finally to have my thyroid checked. I won't get the results until Thursday. Part of me really hopes they say "Yup, your thyroid is under-active...take some meds and you'll be fine". It would explain all the above symptoms (plus the others...I'm a wreck!). And it would be nice to be able to explain it. But there's a part of me that just doesn't want a lifelong condition. I know that I'll still be able to run with it...but I'm just sort of hoping I'm okay. I don't know anymore...

So anyway, I did a 3 mile tempo run today and it was pretty good. I was tired during the run, and so tired after, but I made it through. Yeah, I need to figure out what's wrong with me before I get into those 8 mile long runs later in my training program!