over a year...

It's been over a year of trying to get pregnant. It's been a year of semi-craziness on my part...waking up every morning and taking my temperature, charting signs and symptoms, and hoping, every month, that we would be pregnant. And every month that dream was shattered. Some months were harder than others...the months where I was really late and thought FOR SURE it HAD to be this month that it worked! Nope.

I told Adam that I was just going to stop thinking about it. I can't. I won't lie to myself. I want more children. I will still think about it...probably not as much but I'd be silly to say I'm just going to stand idly by and hope for the best.

It is in God's hands...this much I know. I can't plan it...but I was hoping I could maybe "help it along" a little. I guess not. My help wasn't needed in that area!

Who would have thought that it would be so difficult to get pregnant when you really want to have a baby? I mean, I know there are plenty of other people out there who have tried for longer, and I feel for them, too! It just doesn't seem right...

I really hope we're able to move into our new place soon. I think moving and having to unpack, clean, decorate, etc, will help me stay focused on other things. I hope it will.